Monday, January 14, 2013

Ahhh The Irony...More Job Stuff

Now that the Holidays have passed, my goal has become finding a part-time job to supplement the family's income stream.  It has become more important since The Man of the House (TMotH) has been off work (read: "Voluntarily at first then Laid-off") for almost three full weeks and the savings, once nice and plump after the Hurricane Sandy earnings, have become slim.  I've applied several different places and have updated my contacts via LinkedIn and posted on LinkedIn that I am actively seeking employment.  These measures have resulted in one completed interview and one upcoming interview (Wednesday, I'll be doing a second interview for a position as a school lunch lady - yay me!).

The completed interview was with a staffing agency for temporary office work.  I decided to check into that option since it has been approximately eleven years since I last worked a "Real Job" in a "Real Office," and the gap on my resume`, not to mention the fact that finding references from that last "Real Job" has proven almost impossible, causes many potential employers to overlook my stellar qualifications. (Seriously, a degree in Broad Field Social Studies with a Psychology Major Emphasis isn't a shoe-in for a sales position? Really? Unbelievable!)  I also am not terribly excited about re-entering the fun world of office politics; I'd rather have needles inserted into my eyes than having to deal with back-stabbing co-workers and all the drama that goes with a group of people (women in particular) shoved into cubicles eight hours a day and forced to "work together".  So, the idea of being a temp is appealing because I figure I can side-step any drama with a quick, "I don't know and don't care since I'm not here for long, thank you," while also adding "recent work experience" to my resume`.

I interviewed with a company that is owned by the company for which my best friend happens to work.  This proved advantageous when the (inevitable) question regarding references from my last office position came up: per Bubba's instructions, I replied, "Bubba is my bff and said that she can vouch for me," which quickly caused a stir (apparently Bubba is quite well known and admired in her company, a fact that doesn't surprise me at all since I am her number one admirer) and the question to be dropped.  I left the interview feeling quite optimistic that they would be able to find me a position somewhere and called Bubba immediately to thank her for letting me "drop her name."

About three hours later, a staffing person from the company's sister company called to ask if I would be willing to have him present my information to a company that was looking to fill a temp part-time position. Upon hearing the staffing person's company name, my heart began to race and my hands became clammy.  (Once upon a time, many years ago, the same company placed an inexperienced, numbers-phobic, 19 year old woman in an accounting office doing work with tax returns.  This young woman hadn't even completed her own tax returns at that point, leaving that job to daddy to complete for her, had barely passed Algebra II in high school, and had yet to complete a full semester of any college-level math - had attempted college level math but had dropped the classes upon discovering that a passing grade was not going to happen in this lifetime.  That didn't seem to matter to the staffing company, and I - ahem, the young woman needed a job, so I - she - accepted it.  I was fired by lunchtime the first day.  Apparently, having numbers knowledge is important when working with tax returns.) I questioned the staffing person about the amount of number/math-type work would be required, to which he replied, "Not too much.  Just some inventory and purchasing, but the bulk of the job is administrative." That relieved some of my anxiety, which was further relieved when he told me the flexible days and hours and the rate of pay.  At that point, I agreed to let him present my resume` to the company, and immediately emailed Bubba saying "Wow! That was fast!"  Her reply came as a huge shock: "I think it's great that you'll be working for Planned Parenthood."

HOLD THE PHONE...Where? Planned Parenthood? Seriously? No. No way. Uh-uh. Not happening.  Bubba was surprised by my reaction given the fact that we were both tossed from a "Conservative Book Club" (Read: "It doesn't matter how conservative you are, if you're not Pro-Life in every way, you're not invited back.") for being too soft on the pro-life stance held by the club (Bubba is pro-choice, I am more pro-life than pro-choice, since I believe in exceptions).  TMotH was also surprised by my less than enthusiastic response to the job offer, saying, "If you don't do it, someone else will," like somehow that point would change my mind.

I have to admit to feeling torn, I mean, it was a possible JOB, and I am looking for a JOB.  They would have allowed me to pick which days I wanted to work and probably would've been pretty nice to me.  But the idea of having to walk past protesters to get to my job at a place of which I really am pretty opposed to much of what they do was less than attractive.  Not to mention the reaction I would be sure to get from my conservative friends.  I could just see it:

Me: Hey! I got a job!
Conservative Friend: Yay! Where?
Me: Well, it's only a temp job working in an office.
CF: Where is it?
Me: Uh, do you have any duct tape?
CF: Why?
Me: To wrap around your head, just in case.
CF: C'mon, just say it.  Where are you working.
Me: Are you sure you don't want to wrap your head with duct tape first?
CF: It can't be that bad. What is it, a strip club or something?
Me:  Ha ha, yeah, that's it. I'm working in the office of a strip club.  That'd actually probably be better than this.
CF: Where are you working? I promise not to freak out.
Me: Ok. Planned Parenthood.
CF: ARGGGGGGGGGGH....(sounds of splattering as brains hit me and the walls around us.)
Me: Dang it. Another friend gone.  Should have taken my suggestion and wrapped her head in duct tape like I told her to.

Fortunately, the company didn't choose me for the job.  I'm thinking that they checked out my recent position as writer for the conservative blog and wondered if I might not use any experience at their establishment as fodder for articles (not a bad idea, actually) and marked my name off the list.  However it happened and for whatever reason, I am thankful and relieved.

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